Thursday 22nd June 2006

Strangely it seems my master does not like having my saliva covered, rubber rabbit wrapped all round his legs when he is wearing shorts. I would have thought he would appreciate being invited to play with me a little more than that, all things considered. I tried suggesting he should wear long trousers but he didn’t seem keen in the warm weather. So I took his criticism on board and decided I would try and wash rubber rabbit and then see if he would play, my master, not rubber rabbit. Rubber rabbit is, of course, always willing to play, I bit his legs off to stop him running away. I got as far as throwing rubber rabbit in the air and landing him in the bath but then realised, I couldn’t turn the taps on or reach over the side of the bath to wash him. When my mistress fished him out of the bath I explained what I was trying to do and she gently explained that she didn’t think that would actually make a difference, so I have given up.

Now I’m not sure if this tells you more about my master and mistress than it does about me, it’s probably a close run thing. Anyway, in our office there is a waste paper bin that cheers whenever you throw something in it. My master likes it best, my mistress says the novelty has worn thin. Not thin enough it would seem to actually remove it from the bin but thin enough to let it annoy her when my master keeps throwing things at it that are supposed to go into the recycling waste. I found it rather annoying too, until recently. I used to find that I would just be in the middle of a nice dream, chasing ducks or rabbits as you do, when I would be rudely awoken by a mechanised cheer that in reality only sounds like a cheer if you know that is what it is supposed to be. Now however I have found that the bin can be my ally in causing trouble. If I stand in the right position and wag my tail gently, just hitting the bin, I can make it cheer repeatedly and that annoys everyone. It also annoys everyone when I forget to do it gently and hit the bin so hard it falls over. The down side of that is it usually makes me jump in the process and scaring myself is never the object of the exercise.

My mistress described me as ‘Dog enough not to be human and human enough to be a pet’ earlier. I have been trying to work out whether or not that is a compliment.

 

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