Wednesday 25th July 2012 – Bark Recognition

I’ve been looking at getting some ‘voice’ recognition software. The question is, how easy do you think it would be to train it to my voice? I can bark at different pitches and for different lengths of time. I can woof, whimper, growl and yap – quite pitifully actually. I’ve not really tried howling, but I’m sure Shadow and Aristotle could teach me as it seems to come naturally to them. If I get the software do you think it would be possible to train it so that each of my noises would produce a proper word in the English language? It would be so much easier on the paws if I could simply talk to the computer and get it to do the hard work. My Mistress wants to do some experiments with me. She wants to get it to translate the sound I make when I want my tea and see if each day the sound produces exactly the same word on the computer. She says it’s he own private scientific experiment to see whether I really talk. Of course I talk, what does she think has been going on all these years? Is she trying to admit that she really thinks she spends most of the day having one sided conversations with animals who are rude enough not to reply?


It would also be interesting to see whether my bark gave the same translation as Ari’s or one of the girls. Megan is the one who talks the most so perhaps we should trial it with her. If we all collaborated perhaps we could publish a very important scientific paper on the subject and become famous. You can see the headline ‘Doctor Doolittle redundant as computer translation takes over’.

Alfie Dog with a little help from Rosemary J Kind

Alfie’s Diary – the Book is available at Amazon UK –

You can find short stories to read at

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One Response to Wednesday 25th July 2012 – Bark Recognition

  1. Emma says:

    Hi Alfie, I like the idea but while you are looking into that, see if you can find out any information on scratch and sniff monitors – they would really be great to have for us dogs too!

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