Wednesday 25th February 2015 – I’m not popular

I’m back into my old routine of getting up early and I’m not popular. To be fair this week has been a little extreme with a 5.20 and a 5.35, but out Mistress says that by 10 she feels as though she’s done her day’s work and should be able to give up. She should doze with me in front of the fire, but it seems she feels compelled to fill her time productively. I, on the other paw, feel no such need. As I said to her, ‘Looking on the bright side, at least when the clocks change you’ll be ready for it.’ She is now trying to make me promise not to adjust to the new time by getting up even earlier.

As it turns out with putting my party political broadcast together, it’s not the working with animals or children that is causing the most problem. It’s the software. Oh, I’m in trouble for accidently deleting a clip that our Mistress found a use for, but that’s beside the point compared with the difficulty of getting the software to work as it’s supposed to – or at least as I think it’s supposed to. My Mistress suggested I should read the instructions, but I’m a bloke and together with asking directions, that sort of things goes against the grain. My Mistress was very quick to learn how to detach and delete the barking from the clips we have recorded as every time she played them it set the rest of us off, responding to our own barks. To be honest it didn’t make us look all that bright, but you can never be too sure if it might be another dog in the house impersonating you.

Ari got a shock yesterday. Our Mistress has set her cuckoo clock working for the first time in a very long time. When it cuckooed for the first time Aristotle jumped out of his skin. He got used to it fairly quickly, but it was priceless seeing his first reaction to it.

Alfie’s Diary – the Book is available at Amazon UK –

You can find short stories to read at

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